This one goes out to all you pastors who have been or are currently at the mercy of your All Holy Voters Assembly:
It Only Takes a Vote… (Sung to the tune of “It only takes a spark”)
It only takes a vote to remove a faithful pastor (pastor)
And soon all those around will show the church who’s master (master)
That’s how it is with Synod, Once you’ve experienced it.
Democracy, it works for me, I want to vote him out.
It only takes a vote to send the pastor packing (Packing)
We’ll give him one good year, or less if he is lacking (Lacking)
We really want emotion. Not law and gospel.
Authority, it’s giv’n to me. I want to vote him out.
It only takes a vote to exercise the priesthood (priesthood)
We want our pastor out He preaches like a priest would (priest would)
And nothing like the Baptists, We think they’re right on.
Assem-bl-ee, Suprem-a-cy I want to vote him out.
What a wondrous time it is, when laity are preaching (preaching)
Because the pastor’s gone No more will hear his teaching (teaching)
Bob, you can preach this Sun-day. Jill’s on for mid-week.
The pastor’s gone let’s have some fun. Let’s celebrate the vote!
Name of author withheld.